Saturday, January 12, 2013

Do you make promises you can't keep?


She is only 9. She lives with an awful, complicated, expensive, never-ending disease. Because she lives it, so do we. She knows the dangers of her disease. She knows what can happen. She knows the complications because we decided we wanted her to be aware so she can do her best to manage her disease...even though it made her grow up too fast. Her disease hurts. There is NOT an area of her or our life that is not affected by this disease. This disease kills. It is a disease that takes and takes and takes.

This past year our nation has been plagued with evil people taking the lives of innocent bystanders. Most recently, the Newtown, CT school shooting where a gunman attacked the school with an assault rifle, killing 20 kids and 6 teachers. It was gruesome and horrible. No parent expects that after they take their kids to school, that is the last time they will see them. We chose to tell our girls what happened because of one little survivor's story. A little girl was in a class where she was the sole survivor because she played dead. I can't imagine how horrible it was but  her wisdom could help someone in the future.

Everyone handles trauma in different ways and I don't think there is 1 right way to handle trauma and grief but I think talking about it is a good first step. If you are struggling with this situation then maybe talking is a good option. I guess if you want to try and see a silver lining it would be that, if going through a trauma, I can imagine to know a nation is supporting and thinking and praying for you would help console, if only a little.

Anyway, back to my promise. In the past month 2 kids have lost their lives to Type 1 Diabetes. Sydney overheard Loren and I talking about these tragedies. She came over to me and hugged me and said, "Promise me that will never happen to me." It seems like a simple thing but in that moment it was hard to promise something I couldn't guarantee.  I re-explained everything we do every day and every night to ensure this will never happen to her. It seemed to work and she went off to play. But it's been on my mind ever since. Every year diligent parents lose kids to this disease. At some point we just have to trust ourselves and that we are doing everything we can and leave the rest up to fate. God bless.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

If a kid had to have diabetes, they couldn't ask for a better mom than you. You are my hero with all you do to take care of Sydney and be an advocate on her behalf to anyone who will listen. Thanks for being such a great mom.

Loren

The Lane Family said...

Shamae this post brought tears to my eyes. You covered so many things and made some amazing points. We to talked to Aidan and the kids about what happened. Aidan told us they do lock down drills once a week and have since he started school. He explained how they gather in a specific location they huddle together and then talk quietly and try to read books...they are not to move until they hear the "secret" word over the intercom.

I asked Aidan if he ever is afraid and he told me nope...there are weird people that could wander the hauls and hurt someone and his school works to protect them from them.

Shamae I admire the strength and faith of your family and it would be nice if you could give a an answer and no FOR SURE that it was a perfect promise but all you can do is the best you can and you are right trust in the Lord...HUGS!!!